Curve Ball or Psychiatrist...... Who, Me?

Life and the many "Curve Balls" it throws our way.

Never Fails - Always in the way.

I have not been able to get into any kind of Rhythm here all year long.
It seems as just yesterday I was writing "A Prayer - or - My "REAL" Letter to Santa " , and look at the date.  We are already there again, it is just around the corner.

Music Playlist at MixPod.com

I missed J's Birthday in September, our Anniversary (also in September).
and 
Just Yesterday I forgot to Post anything for my Oldest Daughter's Birthday.


I could use the excuse that I have been in an ULTIMATE FUNK, Depression, Whatever.... and that probably has a part to do with it, maybe all of it but I also can't get past the feeling that something is, has been missing.
(I know, long dragging run-on there, but I am the one writing it not you so Back Off!)


Hell, I haven't even added any Dragons on here lately, AND You ALL know how I am about my Dragons!


Just Yesterday J told me about something I did a few months ago that I have no recollection of ever having done.  Something I had written that she said had to be one of the most eloquent Slams she had ever read. 
I don't even remember it.  


When I last saw my Pulmonologist, J ratted me out on a few things - one of the main reasons I have her go in with me, to tell the Dr. things I might not "See" so he has the full picture, - Well, his suggestion was to see a Psychiatrist as I was beyond him.
It Took 3 months of waiting to finally get in to see one.

Over the last year and a half I have let you all (what readers I have) in to my world with little reservation as to what or how I wrote and thought.
As for this - I won't go into detail, just leave it as I have a ton of WORK to do.... LOL

I will say this:
Depression is NO JOKE -- If you know of someone or see someone sinking Throw them a buoy (Help them if you can).  If you can't, find them someone who can.  It gets worse!

J did for me and kept me afloat until we could find the means to "Pull" me out.
Now I have to figure out how to do the same for her.......

The Great thing about having a Partner In Life --- You both are always there to Help each other when you/they need it.  Even if you don't recognize it at first.

Anyway,
I ask that you all bear/bare (inside joke there) with me and just sit back and see what happens and what is written.

One Thing is for Certain -- Anything at Anytime definitely has stayed true to the Name.

Can't Sleep and Can't Write... Maybe... LOST?

I Hate these nights!

I Hate these periods where I run completely dry and can't put two and two together to get four when it comes to writing.

I have some fantastic ideas, just can't put them together.
Can't for the life of me get past the general idea.

Can't blame meds, being sick, or hurt this time.

Nope!
No can do there.

This one is all in my head somewhere?
(and For those of you that decide to get Smart and say something referencing "sick in the head"..... WELL, :P )

Where am I going with this?

            Your guess is as good as mine!

Remember the name of this site is......... Anything at Anytime.

Well, I have No clue what I will write.  Guess this is Free Writing mode.    ANYTHING

and it is also 12:46 AM my time.  So, I guess that makes this....... ANYTIME

LOST!

That's how it feels.
Lost.
I was doing pretty good in my book.  Had some good things going on here.  I thought and think, and from some of the comments from others they thought so as well.

All the way to January.
Then life somehow got in the way and turned me this way and that way, up there and down there, and side to side.  Before I knew it or even had a clue it was Happening, things got so twisted and bent, I couldn't/can't tell my Head from my Ass when it has come to writing something for this here blog.

I have left myself plenty of "Crumbs" to follow and the birds have not picked them up.
None the less, I am still lost.
But I see that kindly little Ole Lady and I am beginning to wander if I am about to get Cooked somehow.
(Let's see who the first is to tell me what that is in reference too?)

Lost

Lost 

Lost in an Empty Pit of nothing to write.
or
Lost to a Mountain of thoughts I can't corral into a viable writing topic for myself.

Lost actually to Both.
                Funny as hell but true.

I have had this happen before but not to this extent or length of time.

One thing I have learned over the years ---

Shit Does NOT always treat you nice!
Life is NOT always Fair!
However,
with a little patience and time.....
things change, sometimes for the better and sometimes not but they do change.

Deal with the current situation the best that you can.
Patience......
Patience............
Patience..................
and when you least realize it things have changed and in Most cases for the better.
Again, Not Always, but........

Can you make hide or hair of what I wrote?
Not sure I can.

Maybe the Raving Intelligent Lunatic got hold of the Keyboard and my Passwords again?
No, Couldn't have been him.
He actually writes better than this.

Well, I tried my hand at Free Writing tonight/this morning and where did it get me?

Damned if I know!


Danny

P.S.  If you know where this got me PLEASE let me know?